when your strength is not enoughLet me get extra real with you. Many a day my strength is not enough. In the early months of the COVID-19 pandemic, I faced a dilemma. My clients were dealing with their own fires and not turning to outside contract work. My business was tottering. Gasping even.

So one afternoon, I found myself driving to my bank. As I waited 20 minutes in the bank drive-up line, I felt a combination of angst, frustration and shame. I was waiting to hear from the teller and manager about a small business loan that the government was offering to freelancers, independent contractors and solo business owners like me.

When the Going Gets Tough

I felt a gamut of emotions about needing to ask for this disaster assistance. I was running out of emotional courage, let alone financial fortitude. So as I waited, I whispered a prayer and thanked God for always being my Provider. I asked him to make a way for my loan app.

My mind flashed to scenes of those weary husbands and fathers in the Depression who were standing in lines begging for food or a chance at a day job. The above Dorothea Lange’s Migrant Mother photo of a Depression-era mother and her children always grips my heart.

Here I was in a bank line in a different decade, but still needing to humble myself and just ask. I was not destitute or desperate. I was simply determined. I wanted my 25+-year-old business to make it.

And as I waited for the bank’s decision, the song, “Fighting for Me” by Riley Clemmons came on the radio. Wow! Talk about perfect timing. Listen in here.

I hope you’ll be as encouraged as me that Someone is always fighting for you… “when the going gets tough and my strength’s not enough, I see You showing up like never before. . . . You will never stop fighting for me when I can’t fight for myself.”

Showing Up Like Never Before

Just typing those words brings a few tears. I hope I never forget that 2020 afternoon in the bank drive-up line. I didn’t want to be there. But knew I needed to dig deep for my business. I needed to bend when I felt like I would break.

Gratefully, I learned a life-giving truth about humility and letting go of my puny strength. My human effort is limited. God’s is not. It took a while for the small business loan to come through, but it did, and my business is still here.

How is your strength these days? Feeling a bit puny? Weary in waiting? In the words of my friend, Angie, from back in our college days, “Shut up and let the Lord fight for you.” Well, that’s her lighter version of Exodus 14:14. Enraged Pharoah and his massive army were charging after the Israelites. Survival looked bleak. Moses and the people were stuck between Pharoah’s warriors and the imposing Red Sea. Gulp.

You probably know the rest of the story. Weak, worried and wigged out, the Israelites had to surrender to their fear and their own self effort. And God showed up like never before. He would never stop fighting for them. As Riley Clemmons reminds us, He will never stop fighting for me. Or you.